(Appropriate cartoon music comes up. {I've heard a more instrumental version of the theme
which would work, but I don't know where it came from} The 'Daria' logo [minus Daria] comes
up on the screen. The 'Daria' logo [minus Daria] comes up on the screen. Instead of Daria, Jane
[as a rabbit] appears. She leans her right arm on the logo and winks at the camera. The credits
roll. Then, with a final flourish, the music stops with the graphics "Jane Lane In: Inspiration
Desperation")
(Scene One: Lane house, exterior)
Jane: I can't believe I forgot about this!
(Cut to: Jane's room. She is standing in front of her easel. Daria (as rabbit) is sitting on the bed.
Jane is holding a piece of paper in her hand and frowning at it.)
Daria: Well, it's not like you don't have anything to enter.
(Cut to shot of paper. It is for an art contest. Top prize is $1000. The due date is for
Wednesday. Jane looks up and camera follows to look at a desk calender next to her computer.
It says Tuesday.)
Jane: I need something [i]special[/i] for this one. Besides, Ms. DeFoe has already seen my other
good ones.
Daria: I take it she's one of the judges.
Jane: Right you are, Morgenbunny.
Daria (frowning): Don't call me 'Morgenbunny.'
Jane (smirking): Sorry, amiga. Force of rabbit.
Daria: I'm going to force something. Forcibly cut off the flow of blood to your brain.
Jane: I'm going to have to beg off our usual shenanigans, Daria. I've got to get this done.
Daria (standing): That's okay. I'm behind in torturing Quinn, anyway. (Pulls carrot out of her
pocket) I'll see you tomorrow.
Jane: Sure thing, Daria. Just remember to kill her [i]fashionably[/i].
(Daria leaves. Jane looks at blank canvas. Then, her eyes light up and she reaches for a brush.
Just as she starts to touch the brush to the canvas, a massive wall of sound shoots through the
house. Her easel falls over, and the few clothes in top of the closet fall out. The house seems to
rock for a few seconds before coming to a halt. Jane frowns, puts down her brush, then leaves
the room.)
(Scene Two: Lane basement)
(Jane comes down the stairs to see Mystik Spiral practicing [or torturing instruments, whatever].
She stands and yells at them, but can't be heard over the racket. Finally, her eyes narrowed, she
walks over to the power cord to the amp and pulls it.)
Jane: Is there a reason why you have to make so much noise?
Trent (Trent is a rabbit as well [duh]. His fur is the same yellowish-orange as Jane's. He wears a
pair of tan slacks with a hole in the knee and an old, ratty T-shirt. His eyes are brown and
soulful.): Hey, Janey.
Jane: Look, I need some quiet for a while, okay?
Jesse (Jesse is a dog. His ears are long with curly brown fur on them. Otherwise, his fur is a
light cream color. Probably a Spaniel of some kind. His dark eyes hold as much intellect as a
pencil eraser.): Hey, Jane. (Looks at Trent): Don't we have a gig tomorrow night?
Trent: Yeah. And we've got to get this new song done. (Looks at Jane) We've got a new song.
Wanna hear it?
Jane (Backing away and raising her hands as if to defend herself): No, no, that's okay. I'll just
borrow your car so I can go somewhere quiet, okay?
Trent (shrugs): Sure. Keys are on my dresser. (Turns attention to guitar) Or in the kitchen.
Jane (rolls eyes): Trent, check your pockets.
Trent (pulling keys from pocket): Oh. No wonder I couldn't find them this morning.
(Jane takes keys from Trent, then leaves.)
Max (Max is sheep with a ring through his nose): C'mon, we gotta practice. The Spiral is gonna
kick butt tomorrow.
Nick (Nick is a 'twofer' [pronounced two-fer]. He has two sets of arms and two sets of eyes.
His hair is two different colors, but the colors seem to change every three minutes. His ears look
like someone stole them from Yoda. He has two mouths. One is in the normal position, but the
other makes it look like his throat has been cut. All in all, he's a pretty disturbing thing to run
into. Good thing twofers are rare.): What was she upset about?
(Trent shrugs)
======
(Cut to: Jane tossing her easel into the back seat of Trent's car.)
(Cut to: Map showing red line as Jane drives out of town.)
(Scene Three: Top of hill, overlooking the woods.)
(Jane carries easel into shot. She looks around, then set up where she has a good view of the
trees below. She picks up her board and brush and starts to apply paint to the canvas)
Voice (OS): Yep. This is a good place to watch the sunset.
(Jane starts, then rolls her eyes. Looking around, she sees a turtle sitting on a nearby log.)
Turtle: I always come here when I'm feeling blue. I remember the first time like it was yesterday
. . .
(Turtle begins to ramble as Jane stares at it. Time lapse to later. Turtle is still talking, but Jane is
now taking a nap. She wakes up, looks at watch, then starts. She looks at the turtle, then shakes
her head and grabs the easel.)
(Cut to: Map. Red line now shows Jane driving to the far side of town.)
(Scene Four: Riverbank)
(Jane unloads easel and set is up under a tree. She looks around, but sees no one. Smiling, she
gets her paint ready. She is reaching for the canvas with the brush when a voice speaks out.)
Voice OS: Vat are you doing?
Jane (brush goes flying): Gah! (Looking around, she still doesn't see anyone.) Where are you?
Voice: Right here.
(Jane looks up. Hanging from a branch is a large bat. He is wearing glasses like Daria's. She
rolls her eyes)
Jane: I'm trying to paint.
Bat: Really? Vhat are you painting?
Jane: I was [i]going[/i] to paint the shore, but I can't do it because people keep interrupting me.
Bat: I hate it ven people do that.
(Jane puts her head into her hands.)
(Cut to: Globe. Red line shows Jane has gone to West Coast.)
(Scene Five: Top of TransAmerica Building in San Francisco.)
(Jane has everything, including herself, tied down. The wind whips her hair and ears, and bits of
paint fly off as well. She is about to paint when two security guards grab her.)
(Scene Six: Middle of the forest.)
(Jane has her easel set up to paint a picture of the trees. She is about to paint when she stops and
looks at the camera.)
Jane: You know that feeling you get when you're being watched?
(Jane turns to see a Bigfoot staring at her. After a scream, Jane runs O/S. Then, she zips back on
long enough to grab her easel, then zips off again.)
(Scene Seven: Beach)
(The blue car pulls up in the parking lot. Jane gets out and looks at the crowded beach. With a
weary sigh, she gets back in the car and drives away.)
(Scene Eight: Football field)
(The scoreboard in the background shows that it's the Lawndale High football field. Jane sighs,
then begins to paint. She actually gets to paint for a while before there is a sudden whistle,
followed by a voice.)
Voice (O/S): Practice!
(Before she can move, Jane and her easel are run over by the football team.)
(Cut to: Outside Morgenbunny ["Stop calling me Morgenbunny!"] uh, Morgendorffer residence.
The outside consists of a set of steps going down. Yes, the Morgenbu, uh, Morgendorffers live
in a hole in the ground. Jane walks down the steps and rings bell)
(Scene Nine: Daria's room. Since it is underground, there are no windows or curtains. It's still
padded, though. Jane has her easel set up in one corner of the room. Daria is dressed like
something from a toga party. Her glasses are off, and she's trying to keep from squinting at
Jane.)
Jane: Thanks again for doing this, amiga.
Daria: I figured it was this or listen to you complain about it for the next week.
Jane: Ah, yes, the 'squeaky-wheel' philosophy of friendship.
Daria (slight smirk): Exactly. So, how are we coming over there?
Jane: Hold that smirk, Daria. I'll be done in another . . .
(The Fashion Club's voices can be heard outside the room. Despite going into Quinn's room,
they can still be heard chattering about clothes, boys, and fur maintenance. Jane closes her eyes
tightly and sighs.)
Jane: I'll never get this done if I have to listen to them yammer away.
Daria (sighs): Would it get this over with sooner if I asked them to shut up?
Jane: Do you think it would work?
Daria (Pause): No.
Jane: Same here. Look, I still need your for a model. Can you slip out of here with me?
Daria (smirking): Why, Jane, are you hitting on me?
Jane (frowning): I will be in a minute. So, can you come or not?
Daria: Sure, no problem. Mom and Dad won't notice me gone with all the other kids running
amok.
(Jane and Daria are both carrying an end of the easel as they leave the room. Daria stops long
enough to lock the seven locks that are on the door before progressing down the hallway. They
pass several doors on their way. One opens and a young rabbit of about twelve pokes her head
out. She is mostly white, with a pale yellow as her secondary color. The young rabbit is dressed
in a short denim skirt and a blue T-shirt.)
Young Rabbit: Daria, are you going out?
Daria (confused): Who are you?
Y. R.: Quit being mean to me! I'm your sister, Veronica!
Daria: Oh. Sorry, I couldn't place you.
Veronica: You never remember my name!
Daria: Well, it comes with being in class with Mr. O'Neill all the time.
Veronica: Oh. Well, are you going out?
Daria: Jane needs my help with a painting.
Veronica (Looks depressed): Oh. I was hoping you could help me with history.
Daria (glances at Jane, then back): I'll help you when I get back, okay?
Veronica (smiles): Okay. Thanks, sis!
(They go a little way down the hall when a group of four young rabbits go past. Hey, we're
talking about rabbits here. You know, they breed like, uh, well, they have lots of kids.)
(Cut to: Car pulling away from Morgendorffer homestead.)
(Cut to: Map. Red line goes through Lawndale.)
(Cut to: Degas Street. Jane and Daria look at all the people (Human, animal, other) and drive
on.)
(Map: The line continues through the town. It heads out of town.)
(Cut to: Car parks next to a sign reading 'Rest Area.' A group of bikers are glaring at them as
Jane and Daria pull up. A freaked look later, the old car races away.)
Jane (While driving): I'll never get this painting done.
Daria: What exactly is this a painting [i]of[/i], anyway?
Jane (sighes): I have no idea. I started with a landscape, but I had that one run over by the
football team. I've got one of you started, but there's just something missing.
Daria: You said you had a landscape?
Jane: Yeah, but it's got footprints all over it.
Daria: Hmm, I think I might have an idea.
(Scene Ten: Pizza King/Prince/Knight takes pawn/King me!)
(Daria and Jane are sitting at their regular booth)
Daria: So, how'd the contest go?
Jane: This answer your question? (Pulls out check for $1000 and shows it to Daria) Thanks,
amiga. If you hadn't had that little brainstorm I'd still be working on it.
Daria: Well, all you needed was the right title for it and you were a shoe-in.
(Scene Eleven: Lawndale High art room. A blue ribbon is attached to a landscape painting with
multi-colored footprints from several different animals on it. Camera zooms in on a card
attached just above the easel where the painting is resting. The card reads: "Effects of herd-like
behavior on the environment.")
Jane (V/O): Shoe-in. Good one.
(La-la-la-la-la)